


Seduced by Swedish Sirens

by PhantomEngineer



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Gen, Silly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-10
Updated: 2018-05-10
Packaged: 2019-05-04 18:47:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 445
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14599395
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PhantomEngineer/pseuds/PhantomEngineer
Summary: Severus's spying career is brought to an abrupt halt when he accidentally blows his cover by singing ABBA in a Death Eater meeting.





	Seduced by Swedish Sirens

**Author's Note:**

> Written in response to sevi-seviyorum's musing on the idea.

The problem with Death Eater meetings, Severus had decided, was that they were boring. Well, actually, there were many other problems, when he thought about it. The other Death Eaters and Voldemort really put a dampener on things, but remove them and it would just be Severus standing alone in a random field.

When he had first started spying he had been nervous, constantly tense and on the look out for information. He had quickly realised that this was the best way to get caught, so had relaxed back into a more languid attitude. Voldemort didn’t tend to actually provide much useful information, and besides it didn’t matter. Avery, who was the secretary, always took exceptionally detailed notes that he would pass round to them all anyway. Mostly, Voldemort spent his time talking about how great he was and how much he was looking forward to killing Harry Potter. Severus had once spent a significant amount of his time breaking all the topics down into percentages, as actually listening used so little of his brain. On average, 70% of all Death Eater meetings revolved around Voldemort talking about his own greatness. This was followed by about 28% of the time being spent on fantasising about Harry Potter’s death and the remaining 2% was actually useful content. This breakdown might be a part of the reason why Voldemort had yet to actually succeed in his goals of killing Harry Potter and taking over the wizarding world.

As a consequence, Severus had spent some time fiddling with his Death Eater mask, installing headphones and a small device that allowed him to play music during the meetings, rather than have to listen to the dire conversation with all of his brain. It definitely improved his life.

Allowing himself to drift off, he didn’t immediately notice that he was singing along to the amazing song by ABBA that had just come on, mainly because he had always found it to be physically impossible to not sing along to ABBA. With hindsight, that would have suggested that maybe he shouldn’t have included ABBA on his playlist, but they were just too good. With a slight sinking feeling, as Agnetha and Frida continued their glorious singing, he realised the entire room was staring at him. Voldemort had ceased his rambling and the look that he was giving him suggested that Severus’s future might not last past the final notes of the song. It was one of the most tuneful ends to a spying career. 

Years later, Voldemort would later listen to ABBA and realise he had been wrong all along, but by then it was a bit late for such regrets.


End file.
